Actual call from my old job.

I’m at work, and a woman calls up wanting to know if I can give her a key to her unit. This is actual conversation! I had to laugh several times during this, although I really really tried hard not to.

**RING** 11:53 am 

Me: Thank you for calling _______ this is ______ How can I help you?
Her: Do you have my key? *No introdcution at all* 
Me: did you leave me a spare copy to hold?
Her: I dunno… my husband came and got the unit.. I’ve lost the key, can you get me another one?
Me: Did he buy the lock here?

her: I dunno! he just got a unit, how do I get another key?
Me: I dunno. The only way for you to get back into the unit is to cut the lock, or hire a locksmith *long silence*   Ma’am are you there?
Her: yes, I’m here, so you can’t get me another key?
Me: No, ma’am I don’t have one…
Her: Why not?
Me: Because we don’t keep a copy unless someone gives us one. We don’t have access to your belongings, but we can keep a copy in the safe if you think you may lose it and want it as a back up.
**She’s rattling things around as if I’ll change my answer/mind if she just waits long enough.**
Me: ma’am is there anything else I can do for you?
Her: No

 12:05  **RING**

Me: Thank you for calling _______ this is ______ How can I help you?
Her: Hi, it’s me again, now are you the facility I think you are? Because if you are, you’re on the left side of the road, and if you’re NOT, then I don’t want to come out there.

**Now at this point, I’m wondering how am I supposed to know what place she’s thinking of? because it depends on which direction she’s coming from. But! I’m polite**

Me: Ma’am what’s your last name, I’ll see if you’re with us.
 We establish that she has the right location… because she verifys hubby’s name and other information. which is good.
Her: okay thanks!

1:07 pm **RING!**

Me: Thank you for calling _______ this is ______ How can I help you?
Her: can you tell me how to get to you?
Me: where are you?
Her: I’m in the car, driving.
Me: *sigh* okay, ma’am what road are you one?
Her: You know that curvy one with the church and the school on it?
Me: No Ma’am.. where are you coming from?
Her: Haslet

**Okay, I am not from here, and have no idea where Haslet is… or what road she is on. I asked her if she knows any of the main roads that are near me, but it doesn’t matter because:**

Her: Oh!! I found you!
Me: you did? *looking for someone pulling into the lot* I don’t see you.
Her: I’m right here!
Me: Where?
Her: HERE!
Me: Ma’am there’s no one here…
Her: I’m right outside.
Me: Ermm no, you’re not.
Her: Are you SURE?
Me: *chuckle* yeah I’m pretty sure!
Her: I think I’m lost.
Me: I think so too *Ya think??*
Her: well, where am I?
Me: I don’t know. *lmao I’m dying on the inside*
Her: Here talk to ____ she’ll know.
Me: Do you know where X road is?
Her: no talk to ____.
Him: I’m on 820 where do I go from here?

*YAY! Now I’m happy, someone knows where they are!!!*

Me: Are you on X road?
Him: Yes.
Me: Go north from there, you’ll pass a grocery store named ____ on the right, do you see it?
Him: yes!
Me: keep going go through the next light, we are the brown building on the right.
Him: okay!

1:16 pm: **RING!!**  

I’m groaning because I KNOW who it is.. 
Me: Hello?
Her: we’re at Albertson’s… where are you?
Me: *lmao again inside* Is there a Walmart across from you.
Her: yes.
Me: is there a railroad track on your right?
Her: Yes
Me: Does the street sign say X road?
Her: Yes.
Me: Turn RIGHT… go to the very end of the road, make a Right. You’ll see a tree farm keep going.. then you’ll see a strip mall on the right just past that on the LEFT is US! Big Uhaul trucks out front.
Her: okay! Thanks.

1:27 pm *RING!* 

Me: on no! really? *picks up the phone* Hello?
Her: okay I’m at a light with a school.
Me: are you at the end of that road?
Her: No.
Me: keep going to the next light.
Her: okay.. bye!


1:28pm  **RING!**

Her: okay I’m there but I don’t see the tree farm.
Me: you don’t?
Her: no, but there’s a sign that says Trees for sale.
Me: That’s the tree farm. *Shakes head and tries not to laugh*
Her: ok
Me: do you see the Uhaul trucks now?
Her: Yes,
Me: turn LEFT at the trucks.
Her: okay, *silence* Am I here?
Me: do you have a little blue car with it’s blinker on?
Her: yes
Me: then you are here.
Her: Are you sure?
Me: *sigh/chuckle* Yes ma’am!


And NO… she WASN’T Blonde! 

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