Oh yes, you read that correctly. Let me explain… once again it involves the boonies. My aunt and I went to pick up her medicines (she’s recently diagnosed with diabetes) and were heading back to her place. It was dusk, everything was painted in those soft grey and blue tones but gilded with gold with the setting sun.
We once again hit the dirt road. It’s dusty and tan and we are chatting about what we’re going to do with the laser and the projects we had going. I look over at a passing house and see a person standing in the yard then turn my attention back to the road just in time to see something move in the road.
I’m saying: Stop, stop… stopstopstop STOP! Each of those “stops” are getting more frantic.
She sees it too and slams on the brakes and we slide to a stop on the dirt. I ask her if we hit it, she doesn’t think so but we’re looking for the dog and this tiny little yorkshire terrier looking doggo comes trotting out from in front of the car. It looks okay but is still standing in the road.
Now, I’m thinking that the person in the yard is probably his owner and the right thing to do is to make sure the dog gets home and they know we didn’t hit it. I look and there’s no one there.
Me: I swear I saw someone in the yard… why aren’t they checking on the dog?
Her: me too, they had on a hood right?
Me: yeah… but I didn’t realize it was a hood. I just saw a figure in the yard.
Her: I didn’t see any legs.
I suddenly realize I hadn’t seen them either, just a long cloak looking thing with a hood up. We are stopped dead in the road looking at each other for several seconds as we are processing this information.
Me: Nope, uh uh, no freaking way. *shaking my head* It’s too early for that Bull… Back up I’ll go knock on the door.
She backs up and in the yard, there’s a slight hill and as we get into the driveway a figure comes into view. It’s a kid in a long hoodie, with spindly little legs that are barely visible.
Her: Wow, creepy… but at least we know why we didn’t see legs.
Me: Yeah but why didn’t he check on the doggie?
I get out and ask the kid if the dog is his. He says no, the people across the street own him. By now the doggo is at home and with his friend, they are both barking at us. I tell him to let them know that we stopped to make sure the puppers was okay. He said he would.
Our hearts pounding, we get back in the car and drive away. We’re kind of nervously joking and laughing about our “ghost boy” and irresponsible pet owners when all of a sudden a large black shape hits the top of the windshield on my side of the car. She drives a van, the windshield is a good 6 foot off the ground. I let out a small shriek and throw up my hands to shield myself.
Me: What the hell was that?!
Her: I don’t know! Where did it come from?
Me: *pointing from the field on my side of the car* Over there… Did you see it?
Her: I saw it, I just don’t know what it was.
Her: Maybe a hawk dropped something.
Me: Turn around, let’s find out what it is. *We find a place to turn around and go back.*
Her: There’s a small shape in the road. *peering down at the road* It looks like a possum.
Me: A possum? Possums don’t FLY! I’m going to look at it. *gets out and goes around the car.* It’s a freaking rabbit, how the heck did this thing get up that high?
Her: Vorpal bunny? *** Explanation: Vorpal Bunny. (Monty Python’s Holy Grail) (a.k.a. the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog, the Beast of Caerbannog). For death awaits you all with nasty big pointy teeth!
Me: Not funny… *shooting her the dagger eyes* How did it get up that high?
Now about that time, the rabbit jumps to its feet and bounds off, sort of skipping sideways. I’m standing there stunned. I used to raise rabbits, they have fragile little necks that break super easy. This thing hit the windshield with us going about 30 mph, gets up and hops the heck off. How?!
Her: *Shrug* Maybe a hawk had it and we scared it and it dropped it?
Me: I dunno… *brightening up hopefully as I’m getting back into the car* maybe it’s a sign that we need to go back to the Casino and play the Monty Python machine again.
Her: *shoots me dagger eyes* uh No.
Me: Nevermind, I’m done with this crap today. I wanna go home before a freaking velociraptor comes out of nowhere. And also, THIS is why I don’t live out in the boonies.